I have the rough draft corrections doc that was sent to me from my professor and have a working final draft doc . This is an academic case study assignment and there are person shifts as well as some sentence structure issues. I am ok but not great with academic writing assignments but I do my best.
below are comments from my professor.
You have a good thesis and topic sentences based on your three thesis support items.
Your conclusion, however, needs the complete thesis restated as the topic sentence.
Watch all of the tense and person shiftsâ€”present tense for academic writing and no first person pluralâ€”third only for academic writing.
Then watch out for some sentences structure problems along the way and review the semicolon.